Audios

It’s been a long time since I have posted. NO EXCUSES or REASONS (We have excuses when we have NOT accepted responsibility for our actions or non-actions. We have reasons when we want to JUSTIFY our actions or non-actions). Some  reasons are valid and WELL………  So in the spirit of the aforetyped (NEW WORD). I don’t have either. I have no excuses nor any reasons for not posting.  SO I say…..

I got up every Sunday morning to do so and had time…I just didn’t. I was downstairs with my computer and a back up computer….I just didn’t.  There was some Sundays were I COULDN’T SIT down and post and I didn’t.  EVENTHOUGH, I knew that I it was a MUST for me to post (not that I love to be on the BOOK and in your FACE), INREALTIME.  I COULDN’T AND DIDN’T.  I WOULD ASK GOD TO FORGIVE ME AND HE WOULD.  I THEN PROMISED GOD THAT I WOULD DEFINITELY POST THE NEXT SUNDAY. I DIDN’T BECAUSE I COULDN’T.  I JUST COULDN’T POST.  AFTER REPENTING AND FORGIVENESS, GRACE AND MERCY. I COULD NOT AND DID NOT POST…FOR MONTHS.

INREALTIME was birthed out of MY pain (life and growing pains). I was experiencing depression, anxiety, loss, and loneliness.  I was experiencing some extreme financial woes(not unique, but IT WAS MY depression…MY anxiety….MY losses….MY loneliness….MY financial woes).  As I was HURTING I was “…to never let them see you sweat….”  WHAT?  I AM HURTING AND VERY UNSURE ABOUT WHAT TO DO AND I MUST PRETEND THAT I AM NOT HURTING.  WHAT?  I BEGAN TALK…SERIOUSLY TALK WITH THE LORD.  I RECORDED OUR TALKS (NO GOD CAN’T BE HEARD IN THE RECORDING… THE HOLY SPIRIT IS THE MEDIATOR).

INREALTIME, the blog, is the continuous talk, conversation, prayer, lamentation, gnashing of teeth, beseeching of the THRONE of GRACE, consecration, altar call, praise, WORSHIP that I have with the LORD. So what’s different from the previous Sundays when I COULD not post.  I was “INFORMED” that INREALTIME IS THE VISION THAT GOD HAS GIVEN ME.  IT IS HIS (GOD’S) FIRST PROMISE FOR MY  LIFE THAT I WROTE DOWN (SEE THE BOOK OF JOSHUA).  IT IS THE GATEWAY TO ALL OF HIS PROMISES FOR MY LIFE.  INREALTIME would not and can not go away.  INREALTIME IS MY PURPOSE AND MY CALLING.

GOD KNOWS ME.  HE KNOWS THAT I SEETH WITH ANGER WHEN PEOPLE QUOTE SCRIPTURE WHEN I AM HURTING.   HE KNOWS THAT IT WILL MAKE ME RESISTANT TO HIS WILL.    IT IS DUE TO MY EXPERIENCES WITH THE QUOTERS OF THE WORD…. I AM TRYING TO “….CAST MY CARES….” AND THE QUOTERS HAVE SOUND BITES….EXTREMELY IRRITATING AND CAUSES RESISTANCE.    SO IF I AM IRRITATED AND I AM WORKING AND WILLING TO BE IN HIS WILL….WHAT ABOUT THOSE WHO ARE HURTING AND QUESTIONING?….WHAT ABOUT THOSE WHO ARE LOST AND QUESTIONING?….WHAT ABOUT THOSE WHO HAVE NOT ACCEPTED AND ARE SEEKING?

INREALTIME…”…AS LIFE HAPPENS SPEAK THE WORD TO ENCOURAGE AND MOST IMPORTANTLY GET CLOSER TO GOD, JESUS, MY LORD.  THE SOUL’S PURPOSE IS TO STAY CONNECTED AND CONTINUE TO LIVE IN THE WAY OF THE LORD REGARDLESS. INREALTIME IS REMOVING THE BARRIERS, THAT MANY, MOST DEFINITELY MYSELF, HAVE WHEN IT COMES TO WORSHIP AND GETTING CLOSER (TO GOD).  MY GIFT ENCOURAGEMENT IS MAKING ROOM. MY GIFT INREALTIME FOR REAL LIFE PROVING THAT YOU (GOD) ARE ALL WE NEED AND WANT.  INREALTIME IS BLESSING YOUR NAME (GOD).  IT IS HONORING YOU. IT’S FOR YOU (GOD) ALWAYS. IT REMINDS ME OF US AND HOW I AM TO BE IN YOU. IT HAS NO BORDERS OR BOUNDARIES.  IT IS POSTED WEEKLY, IT IS AUTHENTIC, IT’S NOT A CHORE,  AND SOME TO MUSIC…ALL GLORY TO JESUS, CHRIST MY LORD AND SAVIOR THE ONLY GOD!!!!!!!

I AM to share what GOD IS sharing with ME….  INREALTIME IS GOD’S way of making ME humble and teaching me humility.  INREALTIME IS GOD’S way of encouraging ME….INREALTIME IS GOD’S way of drawing ME closer.  INREALTIME IS the way that GOD uses to expose the enemy to ME….and the enemy must flee from ME!!!

INREALTIME REMINDS ME…..

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am sighing as I type this post. Last week was an extremely full and busy week. I was, like most, pulled in several directions while trying to MAINTAIN. It is not as easy as it use to be (Can I get a witness?). Last week rendered me “exhausted” and I did NOTHING on yesterday ( Saturday, March 4, 2017) with the exception of the grocery store and hanging out with “THE CHAMP” at the park for at least an hour.   I did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING-I was on my couch and BARELY watched Netflix (the thrill is leaving), I didn’t put anything in its rightful place (wordy way to say I did not clean up). I was overjoyed when a previous engagement was cancelled. I wanted to stay in my sweat pants and t-shirt, no socks and house shoes. I didn’t do much snacking or eating for that matter. COULD NOT move from my position on the couch-“Girl don’t move from couch, Girl don’t snack/eat).     I became content on just being still and DOING NOTHING. I was struggling with doing NOTHING-I had to clean house; I had to get my food and clothes ready for next week; I had papers, test and projects that needed to be graded; I had to return items to stores; I HAD TO………; I HAD TO……….(FILL IN THE BLANKS).

“…NOTHING FROM NOTHING leaves NOTHING, you got to have SOMETHING IF YOU WANT TO BE WITH ME…” lyrics from a very popular song.  I did nothing so, I accomplished NOTHING (no clean house, no graded papers, etc…..). Should have done something-throw away papers, fold towels, something, but nothing.

BLESSED the LORD-It is now, as I type this, that I realize NOTHING is EVERYTHING. I AM HONESTLY STATING THAT I AM NOTHING. I AM NOT THE NICE, FRIENDLY, GIVING, KIND, LOVING, GENUINE , GOOD, GENEROUS, HUMBLE,PATIENT, AUTHENTIC PERSON THAT YOU THINK I AM. I AM NOT THOSE THINGS. I AM NOTHING. I HAVE NO THING THAT IS OF VALUE. BUT GOD. WITH GOD AND IN GOD I AM EVERYTHING HE SAYS I AM. NOTHING MAKES me humble and teaches me humility. NOTHING CONSTANTLY AND CONSISTENTLY REMINDS ME THAT

…….HE LOVES me in SPITE of ME and that it is the reason that I can say with confidence and boldness……

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

With the LORD’S Blessing, I will be a YEAR BETTER on Tuesday, February 28. Yes, I AM graying, been there, still THERE and will STAY THERE, except for the 1B Rinse that covers it TEMPORARY (I got from my Momma). Yes, I HAVE joined, but still REFUSE to stand in solidarity with the BIFOCAL Nation (still struggling with VANITY issues as I make my way to Dollar Tree to buy reading glasses).

I AM no longer trying to KICK IT. I AM NO LONGER TRYING TO BE on FLEEK. I AM NO LONGER TRYING TO GET ‘TURNT, I AM NO LONGER TRYING TO GET LIT. I DON’T CARE TO BE ‘BOUT IT, ‘BOUT IT or LEAN BACK (OLD SCHOOL HIP-HOP References).

PLEASE NOTE: IF your gathering starts around 8:30 pm. I will be there ON TIME (that means 8:30, not AROUND 8:30ish, say 9:00 pm) BECAUSE I WILL BE LEAVING AROUND 10:00-10:15 pm. The Gathering SPELL is undone @11:00 pm. At 11:00 pm, the hair (the SALON FAIRIES CREATED AN EXQUISITE MASTERPIECE THAT SURELY TURNED HEAD) is in rollers (not curlers, ROLLERS and tied down), my trendy OUTFIT TURNS INTO A NIGHT GOWN (pajamas in the winter), MY Shoes become my comfortable, NEEDED and SHOULDA bought a NEW PAIR months ago house shoes. My car becomes a bed AND I AM SOUND ASLEEP. ASLEEP!!!!!!

Sorry for the TANGEYNT (NEW WORD- I spelled it correctly-Tangey went on a tangent, hence TANGEYNT).

February 28 is day for the culminating (yes, educators, I said or typed, in this case, culminating) celebrations and activities. For every day in CHRIST, we get better. Every day, there are new GRACES and MERCIES. Every day, GOD PROVES HIMSELF TO HIS PEOPLE (HE SHOULDN’T HAVE TO FOR HE HAS PROVED HIS FAITHFULNESS).

It took time to get to the place where I saw the BLESSINGS and MIRACLES of GOD daily and continuously. I was too caught up in BEING whatever, whenever to whomever. As the old saying goes, I went WAY TOO FAR and Stayed WAY TOO LONG. I WAS, AS I SAID BEFORE, TOO BUSY DOING NOTHING.

It was during my quad-life crisis (age 25-32), when I began to assess and stress over my life and lack thereof. I was not married; I did not have 2.5 kids. I did not have a college education. I WAS STILL AT HOME WITH MY MOMMA. I changed jobs; I moved out of my momma’s house, I enrolled in college. I began doing MY thang. Living, so I thought, the LIFE. I was KICKING IT, I was ON FLEEK, I was TURNT, I was GETTING LIT, and I WAS ‘BOUT IT, ‘BOUT IT as I was LEANING BACK AND I ACCUMULATED MUCH DEBT (TRYING TO IMPRESS PEOPLE-SHOULD HAVE USED IT TO TRAVEL THE WORLD)

During this time, I blamed my momma (textbook) for everything that I thought was wrong in my life and with my life. Her choices were the reason I was not yet married; her choices were the reason I did not have kids; her choices were reason I did not have a college education. I didn’t go home much and I lived less than 3 miles away.  I was too busy LIVING, so I thought, LIFE. This was the time when I took time for granted.   I had to catch up. I didn’t have time and didn’t make time for family. I was too busy, again trying to be whatever, whenever to whomever.

BLESS the LORD-As I went through the motions of being whatever, whenever to whomever-HE was CALLING ME. HE WAS SHOWING ME THAT FAMILY WAS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT. HE SHOWED ME THERE WAS NOT A NEED THAT MY FAMILY DID NOT TRY TO HELP ME WITH. THEY WITHHELD NOTHING FROM ME.

IN HINDSIGHT, I LACKED NOTHING. THERE WAS NOTHING FOR ME TO REALLY DESIRE. I HAD EVERYTHING THAT MATTER-GOD, HIS LOVE FOR ME, (CHASTISEMENT AND ALL), MY FAMILY, AND MY FRIENDS. I stopped waiting on February 28 to celebrate my birthday. If I wanted Catfish Cabin, I went to Catfish Cabin. If I wanted Red Lobster, I went to Red Lobster. If I wanted to celebrate and fellowship with family and friends, I called them up and we got together. If I wanted a new dress, new purse and several pairs of new shoes, I purchased them.

It was during this time, I tried to apologize to my momma for being absent (I was less than 3 miles away) from the family. She would not let me utter a word. She just hugged me and told me that everything was fine. She never brought up my absence. THIS IS WHERE GOD opened my eyes to HIS BRAND NEW MERCIES.  MOMMA WAS DOING  FOR ME WHAT GOD HAD DONE FOR HER AND WHAT HE DOES FOR ALL OF US-HE DOES NOT BRING UP OUR PAST, OUR FAULTS, HE DOES NOT ALLOW US TO LIVE IN CHAINS AND IN SHAME. IT WAS LOST IN THE SEA OF FORGETFULNESS. WHAT A WONDERFUL, LOVING, MERCIFUL GOD.

On February 28^, 1970, The LORD blessed me with Walter Lee Skinner and the love of my life, my muse, Dorothy Mae Skinner, my beloved momma. Prior to her passing and after I returned home, we would spend my birthday together. I would take a personal day, go swimming (one of my prayer closets and thank GOD for my family) and then spend the day with my momma. Whatever she wanted to do on my birthday, IT was fine by me. I gave her gifts on my birthday.   I was blessed with her and wanted to celebrate my blessing, my momma.

Now that she is present with the LORD, I STILL CELEBRATE my birthday, my blessings: Walter and Dorothy Skinner. I started with having weekend celebrations (not my idea, but an excellent one nevertheless), then I moved to having a birthday calendar with various activities. It was to celebrate life with those who desired to celebrate with me. I didn’t want gifts (I will take them) and I wanted to celebrate and share the LORD, “…Silver and Gold have I NONE; but such as I have give I thee; ….In the name of JESUS CHRIST of Nazareth rise up and walk…” in HIS JOY, in HIS POWER, in HIS DELIVERANCE, in HIS HEALING, in HIS PEACE and in HIS LOVE.

IN OTHER WORDS “…PARTY OVER HERE…AND THANK GOD, HE LOVES me in SPITE of ME and that it is the reason that I can say with confidence and boldness……

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

Teddy, Teddy, Teddy… Teddy Pendergrass. Don’t play, you know the song that I am referencing ”…It is used to be every time I would cry my heart out over you…I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, I would just sit at home and weep….It used to be ….”

In the Tantrumization (NEW WORD?) phase of my calling- there was much BELLYACHING, SNOTTING, SCREAMING, HEAVING AND GAGGING.   I RELUCTANTLY, WITH EXTREME HESITATION, FEAR and DOUBT ACCEPTED MY CALLING.

Accepting the Call and Sharing the Call, I believed were mutually exclusive. I was careful with whom I shared it with. At least I thought. There were and still are many who doubt and question it-including myself. Seriously, I went from REALLY GOD? To ARE YOU SURE GOD? I am currently in the Alright GOD phase of my calling. I desire to KNOW HIM and HIS WAYS in 0rder to HONOR HIM IN ALL THINGS.

My desire to REALLY KNOW GOD REQUIRED ME TO GIVE IT AND I MEAN ALL OF IT TO HIM.

I tried with all earnest to PROVE to GOD, to GOD that I could handle IT, that IT was not an issue.

When my I realized that I was not “getting IT right”, when I realized that IT could not be fixed by no one BUT GOD. I reluctantly, yes, reluctantly with extreme hesitation gave IT to HIM. Not knowing that IT was what HE wanted from me all the time.

REALLY, giving IT to GOD has not been pretty, easy, comfortable and has been the cause of much of my irritation with everything and everyone and resulted in anxiety and some sleepless nights. IT has caused much weeping and gnashing of the teeth.

Now, IT, in the hands and guidance of the LORD PREPARES and STRENGTENS me for what have come: loss, Betrayal, the lost of friendship-the intimacy and intensity.

I am so NUMB-not numb from the pain; I am NUMB because I AM SO OVER IT. THERE IS MUCH WORK TO DO FOR THE KINGDOM OF GOD.  THIS WAS JUST GOD’S WAY OF REMOVING BARRIERS TO OUR INTIMACY. THIS WAS ANOTHER WAY FOR HIM TO PRESENT ME FAULTLESS FOR I DESIRE TO NOT ONLY HONOR GOD IN WORD BUT IN DEED-HOW I LIVE, WHAT I SAY, MY EXPRESSIONS AND YES, HOW I HANDLE HURT, LOSS AND BETRAYAL.  I HAVE ALREADY CRIED. YES, I AM TALKING ABOUT- BUT THANK GOD THE DISCUSSION IS A SHORT ONE AND I AM TRYING TO MAKE SURE THAT I DID NOT CAUSE THE BETRAYAL OR LOSS.  NO ONE IS TO BLAME (LOOK AT GOD).  IT IS WHAT IT IS AND TO EVERYTHING THERE IS A SEASON.

I wanted to cry, I tried to cry, I wanted to feel sad and garner sympathy. I wanted to “get caught up in my feelings” and let my feelings guide and led me.

I HAD A PRE-CRY (NEW WORD). I HAD ALREADY CRIED OVER MY CURRENT LOSS ACTUALLY WHEN I GAVE ALL OF IT TO GOD!!!!!

Giving IT to GOD, has really MATURED me, “…IT DON”T HURT NOW…NO MORE ….heartaches NO MORE heartaches…all that IS Changed…” for JESUS CHRIST REMOVED THE PAIN.

HE LOVES me in SPITE of ME and that it is the reason that I can say with confidence and boldness……

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

 

As I continued to hit the snooze button on this morning, contradictory to my declaration of “I will be up and ready to post IN REAL TIME @ 5:00 a.m.” I actually reset the clock to 5:30 after hitting the snooze button. As a result my 30 minutes of “just a few more minutes” was just that: a few more minutes. I spent more time “setting my clock” and “getting back in bed”. I was only delaying the inevitable-THE WORK.

As I went through my morning rituals (you KNOW), I was running on all cylinders to post IN REAL TIME. I set the mood, I put on some Fred Hammond (playlist YouTube) and the first song was “NO WEAPON” and you KNOW there was some WEEPING (GOD IS FAITHFUL) for the HOLY SPIRIT , HE reminds me of the CONTINUOUS, CONSISTENT, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE OF GOD.   I retrieved my computer and attempted to sign on to the page to post. MY internet is working, but I cannot access the internet from MY computer (NO IP address). WHAT? Can’t access the internet on my personal computer, but was able to access on my work computer for work all Friday night and most of Saturday and I CAN’T ACCESS THE INTERNET ON MY OWN COMPUTER IN MY OWN HOUSE TO POST IN REAL TIME. NO, I HAVE NOT PAID MY PHONE BILL YET, BUT my television is accessing the INTERNET (YOUTUBE-FRED HAMMOND PLAYLIST).

I contemplated calling A T & T and decided against it (NOT BECAUSE OF THE NON PAYMENT) for it may take too long to trouble shoot. Yes, I could use my work issued computer, but using my computer is in itself a testament to FAITHFULNESS OF THE LORD. LET, ME ‘PLAIN, LET ME ‘PLAIN.

For almost 2 or more years, my computer screen was “bleeding” (don’t know correct term). One half of the screen was pink, hot pink. I tried to get it fixed and many stated that I should just purchase another computer. Theoretically, yes, financially, NO. COULD NOT, COULD NOT afford another computer and DID NOT, DID NOT HAVE reserved resources for ANYTHING, ESPECIALLY A COMPUTER.

I saved my work on the infamous flash drives (must know put in google docs). I posted IN REAL TIME on the computer with the “bleeding screen”. I stopped making excuses and used what was in my hand. I squinted and posted, and one day, the computer with the “issue of blood” was no longer. No more “bleeding screen” SO I MUST post from THIS COMPUTER and it DOES NOT HAS ACCESS TO THE INTERNET.

NO WEAPON AND NO EXCUSES-I AM TYPING IN REAL TIME ON THE COMPUTER, I WILL SAVE TO A FLASH DRIVE AND I WILL POST ON ANOTHER COMPUTER.   GOD ALWAYS HAS A RAM IN THE BUSH. HE ALWAYS MAKES PROVISIONS FOR HIS PEOPLE.

KNOWING THAT NO WEAPON WILL PROSPER (THERE WILL BE ATTACKS), WE MUST STOP MAKING EXCUSES FOR NOT LIVING, BEING AND DOING WHAT THE LORD DECLARED FOR OUR LIVES. EVEN WHEN WE SQUANDER THE PROVISIONS, EVEN WHEN WE CONSTANTLY QUESTION HIS FAITHFULNESS, EVEN WHEN WE ALLOW FEAR TO OVERCOME US AT TIMES, EVEN WHEN WE PACK OUR TACKLE BOXES and   GO FISHING-HE IS STILL FAITHFUL. HE IS GOD.

HE LOVES me in SPITE of ME and that it is the reason that I can say with confidence and boldness……

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

I’m BACK. I want to “say” that I was on holiday and did not post anything.  That’s NOT my story and I am NOR sticking to it.  Being on holiday (Christtmas break) was and is a plausible reason to take a break. You know family, friends, peace on Earth and good will toward men.  As I type this, I am rationalizing, “GOD….. says that there is a time to rest, and created the Sabbath and HE RESTED.”  For I was truly tried.  NO TIED- T-I-E=D(my word for tired). That’s what I SAID. And it is so far AWAY from the REAL TRUTH.

FOR REAL, FOR REAL-I had overextened and over committed myself in WORKS. No, this is not “I was so busy helping others that I forgot to do something for myself..” That’s not it at all. I was TOO busy doing and being for MYSELF-not selfishly or narcissistically but really focusing on BEING and DOING what I am PURPOSED FOR.  I was doing the WORK, even the WORK that I abhor (asking GOD for ZEAL in all things for it’s for HIS GLORY).

I was WORKING SO that I  forgot to WORSHIP.  Oh, I prayed and thanked GOD, but I did not spend time, QUALITY time with HIM. You KNOW that time when YOU Can JUST BE!!! NO BIG WORDS needed or DESIRED by HIM, JUST BEING with HIM,  PURPOSEFUL and INTENTIONAL BEING WITH HIM. KNOWING how I NEED, DESIRE and WANT TO HONOR GOD IN ALL THINGS, I FORGOT TO WORSHIP. and it showed. I WAS SO busy WORKING (focusing on BEING and DOING what I am PURPOSED FOR) that I became tired and I JUSTIFIED not posting (it was during the holiday and I need a break).

I realized that I should have been WORSHIPPING WHILE  I WAS Working, WORSHIPPING WHEN I WORKING and WORSHIPPING WHERE I WAS WORKING.  Had I been WORSHIPPING, there would have not been a “NEED” for an extended holiday and I would have posted prior to this.

WORSHIP-Balances ME..  WORSHIP Directs ME.  WORSHIP Grounds ME. WORSHIP Humbles ME. WORSHIP Overwhelms ME. WORSHIP Reminds ME…….

HE LOVES me in SPITE of ME and that it is the reason that I can say with confidence and boldness……

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

I HAVE BEEN BUSY-not because of the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season, IT IS MY SEASON. I have been in what I call “the INTANGIBLE PHASE”(“..Evidence of THINGS not seen….”) GOD IS COMMANDING that the INTANGIBLE PHASE  of HIS PROMISES for my life MANIFEST.  I AM CONSTANLY OVERWHELMED, OVERJOYED AND HUMBLED BY THE MANIFESTATIONS  OF GOD’S PROMISES FOR MY LIFE.

I am DISCOVERING that MORE is REQUIRED of me in the MANIFESTATION PHASE of GOD’S PROMISES.  I am busy worhipping to fight anxiousness, weariness and the CONSTANT RELENTLESS ATTACKS by the enemy as GOD allows my INTANGIBLES to MANIFEST. I am busy LIVING in the PROMISES OF GOD.  LIVING in the PROMISES of GOD REQUIRES me to ShONUFF TRUST GOD.

I find myself “…sitting at the king’s table…” at the “king’s INVITATION. ME, little ol’ ME, sought after by the “king” AND he,the “king”, quoting Mark Anthony from Shakespeare, “…lends me his ear…”, as we discuss “kingdom business”.  The “king”, after lending me his ear, decrees that IT, MY (GOD GIVEN) ideas and MY (GOD GIVEN) concerns, IS so and I , AM AWESTRUCK. Not because I am sitting at the “king’s” table at the “king’s” invitation, ) I AM NO LONGER IMPRESSED by people and their things for I AM BLESSED  and HAVE LESS STRESS) IT IS DUE to actually SEEING the POWER of GOD MANIFEST in MY LIFE.  I Can’t put SEEING the POWER of GOD and the Manifestation of HIS PROMISES for my life in words.  I am in it as it is constantly and continuously happening-MULTIPLE MANIFESTATIONS.

So as a result of the MANIFESTATIONS-MULTIPLE MANIFESTATIONS, as I stated (typed in a previous paragraph)-I am busy (WORSHIPPING, PRAISING, PRAYING, FASTING, WORKING, LISTENING, DISCERNING, BESEECHING) and will remain busy (WORSHIPPING, PRAISING, PRAYING, FASTING, WORKING, LISTENING, DISCERNING, BESEECHING)because ‘Tis MY Season: MY SEASON of MANIFESTATION-MULTIPLE MANIFESTATION.

GOD, SHOULDN’T HAVE TO BUT HE ALWAYS DOES, PROVE HIMSELF FAITHFUL. hE LOVES ME IN SPITE OF ME AND THIS IS HOW I CAN SAY WITH CONFIDENCE AND BOLDNESS THAT…..

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

 

 

 

 

This morning I woke singing “I Shall See HIM For Myself” a song by one of my favorite singers,John P. Kee.   I decided not to just sing the song, but to pull it up on Youtube to hear John P. Kee sing one of my favorite songs.

Listening to song, I begin to think of my Momma, Dorothy Mae Skinner Jordan. The love of my life, before the LORD called her home, she was my muse.

I remember the last time I saw my Momma in my house prior to the LORD calling her home. She had come to my NEW house  two weekends prior to Thanksgiving 2006 to teach me how to make dressing and her peach cobbler.  I remember her fussing and laughing at me because I kept washing my hands (they were getting dirty with corn meal and flour).  She then laughed heartily and stated, “You, like your Aunt Carrie spend all day in the kitchen and when you finish, you have a little of this and a taste of that…”

She then began to state that I was the way I was because of my siblings -Beverly, Don, Mary, Martha, Lee and Sharon.  She stated that they WOULD NOT “LET” Babe (Beverly’s name for me and everyone else it appears), Babyboba (my brothers’ name for me), Little Girl (Sharon’s name for me), Babysnooky (her name for me that she then GAVE to Demetrick Jr. and Montelle Jr.). She also stated that my nephews, Keith, Montelle and Demetrick were always trying to protect me and they spoiled me as well.

As this holiday season has come upon us, I am determined to BLESS the LORD for giving me my Momma, Dorothy Mae Skinner Jordan.  I miss her tremendously.  It was through my momma that I learned to LOVE the LORD AND TRUST HIM.

My Momma stopped attending church.  SHE NEVER STOPPED LOVING, BELIEVING AND TRUSTING GOD.  She, like many others had been hurt several times by the church and the last time the pain it caused was severe.  I too was hurt. I felt my Momma’s pain  and I ached because I though I had lost the love of GOD (I  was 12 years old)and I became a cynic,  I went from “…yes,  OUR GOD CAN,OUR GOD HAS and OUR  GOD WILL…” to GOD CAN, GOD HAS and GOD WILL but NOT for ME and MY family and for MY Momma.

I did not enter another church or attend any religious ceremony until I was 22-23 years old.  Church was not my thing.  There was a reverence for GOD, HE has provided for others, just NOT FOR MY FAMILY.  With the exception of my Grandmother Evelyn Jackson, Aunt Carrie, Aunt Lois, Aunt Mary, and my sister in law, EVERYONE in church were hypocrites.  I did not maliciously attack anyone’s beliefs; I just DIDN’T WANT to hear it.  GOD responsed to the prayers of others not my prayers and my families prayers.

It was not until I heard my Momma singing early in the morning aournd 3 or 4 a.m., a gospel song, “….I love the LORD…and long as I live and trouble rise…I’ll hasten to HIS throne…” AND SHE WAS CRYING.  WHAT IS SHE SINGING?, WHY IS SHE SINGING THAT? I NEVER asked her (can not get in grown folk’s business), but I KNEW that GOD was trying to get my attention.  HE KNEW that if my Momma, the LOVE of my LIFE, began to call out to and speak to and of HIM; I would follow suit. 

I became extremely angry with GOD after HE called MY MOMMA home.  I questioned WHY would HE take MY Momma.  I asked why HE didn’t dumbfound world renowned doctors and specialists with the miracle that HE SHOULD Have (that’s how I felt) that HE SHOULD HAVE performed. And the miracle SHOULD HAVE been peformed for me.  THE HOLY SPIRIT BEGAN TO MINISTER TO ME. HE REMINDED ME THAT MY MOMMA WAS GOD’S CHILD AND THAT SHE WOULD WANT TO BE IN PERFECT PEACE WITH HER GOD. THAT HE WAS HER GOD TOO AND SHE DESIRED AND LONGED TO BE IN HIS PRESENCE.  SHE LOVED ME BUT SHE LOVED GOD MORE.

IT WAS THEN WHEN I REALIZED THAT I TOO LOVED GOD MORE THAT I LOVE MY MOMMA.  IT WAS THEN THAT I LEARNED  AND I AM STILL LEARNING TO TRUST GOD. IT ALSO HOW I CAN CONTINUE TO DECLARE WITH BOLDNESS

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

 

 

 

 

Last night prior to going to bed has been like other times in my life in which I KNEW that I was to pray (I still pray on my knees before bed). Just like the other times, last night I could not think of anything to say to EXPRESS TO LORD HOW GREAT HE IS AND HOW GRATEFUL I AM (STILL NOT ENOUGH FOR WHO HE IS).  I even expressed to the LORD that IT was not that I didn’t know what to say and the order (Thanksgiving/Worshipping, Repentance, Request) in which to say it in.  I wanted to make sure that my prayers were authentic and not ritualistic (order of prayer).

I KNOW THAT I COULD HAVE SHOUTED HALLEJUAH AND IT WOULD BE PRAISE TO GOD.  BUT IT WOULD HAVE FELT RITUALISTIC. I KNOW THAT I COULD HAVE SAID THANK YOU UNTIL I HAD FALLEN TO SLEEP, BUT IT WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ENOUGH AND WOULD HAVE FELT RITUALISTIC.

YES, the HOLY SPIRIT BROUGHT TO MY REMEMBRANCE OF MY MANY BLESSINGS, DELIVERANCE, STRENGTHEN, MY JOY (THE WORLD SHONUFF TRIED TO TAKE AND IT WAS WORTH EVERYTHING TO HAVE IT FILLED AGAIN) AND MY PEACE.  AND YET, NOTHING. IT FELT THAT THE PRAYER AND THE SHOUTING WOULD HAVE FELT RITUALISTIC.  I TRIED TO CONJURE UP OLD HURT AND PAIN SO THAT I COULD CRY, SHOUT AND REALLY PRAY AND THANK GOD (…WHOM THE SON SETS FREE IS FREE INDEED).. NOTHING

As THE HOLY SPIRIT continue to bring to my rememberance, HE (HOLY SPIRIT) ALSO reminding me of some hymns “….if I can’t say a word, I’ll JUST WAVE MY Hand….”

WAVING MY HAND when there are NO WORDS; WAVING MY HAND even when WORDS ARE NOT ENOUGH. GOD IS SO….. ((I AM WAVING MY HANDS) THAT THE COMFORTER, THE HOLY SPIRIT,  INTERCEDES ON MY BEHALF AND EXPRESS TO GOD THE WAVING OF MY HANDS.  GLORY TO GOD. 

So if anyone sees me WAVING MY HAND, it’s conveying the GOODNESS of my HOLY, GLORIOUS, MIGHTY, WONDERFUL, DELIVERING, SUSTAINING, PROVIDING, STRENGTHEN, JOY AND PEACE GIVING AND  LIVING GOD.

HE LOVES me in SPITE of ME and that it is the reason that I can say with confidence and boldness……

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

 

Tangey V.

INREALTIME

 

 

 

I predicted it-Donald Trump would be elected the president of the United States.  My prediction would come after I had listen to the Tom Joyner morning show in which a caller was “nickle and diming” reasons the millennials gave for not voting in this year’s election and not voting for either candidate: “….tried of hearing how people died for the right to vote…we want to discuss living in the wake of Blacks and others being killed by police…” ,  “…Hillary is not Bill…she can’t assume that Black people will vote for her because we voted for him…” , …I don’t think either candidate is viable….”, MY FAVORITE (I AM A RECOVERING CYNIC), “…I NOT FEELING, FEELING, FEELING…IT IS NOT EXCITING TO ME…”

Quoting from  The Color Purple, “…SPEAK LORD, SPEAK TO ME…” FOR THE ELECTION OF Donald J. Trump SPEAKS VOLUMES AND I AM LISTENING TO AND WAITING ON GOD.   I AM NOT AFRAID of the  “WHAT AND HOW” of a Donald Trump Presidency.  I WILL CONTINUE TO LIVE AND PROSPER IN THE NAME OF THE LORD.

I have and still am learning to not just “…hasting to HIS THRONE when trouble rise…” I am, with the guidance of the HOLY SPIRIT, communing with GOD on the REGULAR (not easy, HOLY SPIRIT, HE is working on me-THANK GOD). I don’t fret as MUCH (Still learning), I AM REMINDED THAT ANYTHING THAT LEADS TO A DISTRACTION AND A DISRUPTION IN MY PURPOSE IN GOD, IS FORTHCOMING AND NEVER CEASES.  In my regular (STILL NOT ENOUGH BECAUSE HE IS GOD), communion with HIM, HE reminds me of WHOSE I AM.

Yes, there will some policy changes that may impact me, my family and friends.  Yes, racism, which had not died or gone away, is front and center and expressed unapolgetically.   Maybe NOW, young people will, (unfortunately this election  is the catalyst, the pig pen, the Damascus Road for many), learn their history and seek to GOD: Maybe NOW others will repent and STOP sinning and return to GOD.

Well, it is over and it is done and the PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN (ELECTORAL COLLEGE) .  Donald J. Trump is President-Elect AND GOD IS SOVEREIGN.

…Nothing will separate ME from the LOVE of GOD which is in CHRIST JESUS…..”

Tangey V.

INREALTIME